Ever committed yourself to something and then thought, "What did I just get myself into?"
As I prepare for my time on the mission field, I am reminded that I will be headed into a very post-modern, liberal culture to share God's plan for Salvation. I don't know the post-modern mindset. I could go into a crisis pregnancy center and share my story with women who may be considering an abortion. I could go into an eating-disorder ward and tell the patients that I know their pain. Or I could just keep working with children, like I enjoy doing now.
But God hasn't called me to spend this next year doing crisis pregnancy, eating disorder, or children's ministry. He's called me to something completely out of my comfort zone. He's called me to raise $22,000 to do it, knowing that I am not quite making minimum wage with Americorps, nor do I have a "sales" personality that will make fundraising easy, and that unemployment rates are sky-high and no one has money burning a hole in their pocket. He's called me to go without clear direction- I know the missions org has everything under control for the year that I will be there, but I have no idea what to do when I get back to the US...will there be a job open? Am I supposed to continue my education? How will I pay for school? How about a car or a place to live?
This is a scary place to be in. But I'm glad I'm here.
I'm reminded of just how desperately I need God. I can't accomplish any of this on my own. When everything falls into place and I look back, I will remember just how sovereign He is. I will remember that I can do all things through Christ who gives me strength.
I can't wait to see this all happen and know that it's God in action.
